Everyone Has Something To Say, But Who Listens Anymore?

It seems these days everyone has a story they want to tell.  Just hop on YouTube, Tumblr, Twitter or Facebook and you will instantly find hours upon hours of material people are just dying to shove in your eyeballs.  In an age where technology allows anyone with an Internet connection, a computer, a webcam and some editing software to become a “celebrity” (and yes, I’m using that term lightly) it doesn’t look like the flow of meaningless banter will ebb anytime soon.  Subject matter be damned, whomever gets the most ReTweets (RT’s), Likes or Subscribers wins the battle.  It’s just that simple.

But what about the stuff we should be listening and paying too?

Last week I saw a story from Not In The Kitchen Anymore where she was threatened to be raped on XBOX Live.  Though she first went about getting this addressed by going to Microsoft and logging a complaint, she wasn’t heard until she turned to the Internet and posted her story and got the word out that way.  Because of her story and the buzz it created in just a matter of hours, Microsoft finally acted and has dealt with the perpetrator.  I ask that you take the time to read her story and follow it’s progression.  She has done a wonderful job documenting her experience so that hopefully we all can learn something from her unfortunate ordeal.  You can also follow her on Twitter at @NitKA_Official.  Also, while on there you should follow Jill Pantozzi ( @JillPantozzi ) too if you aren’t already because she’s the one who got Jenny’s story in front of me to begin with.

The real question we should be asking ourselves is why did she have to go viral with her story to finally gain traction with those in a position to address it?

It’s not like someone was calling her a name because she stole a kill or need rolled on a piece of gear her class doesn’t need.  She was threatened with physical and mental harm just because this individual felt he could do so without repercussion.  Sadly, if it were anyone else whom he sent that message too he may very well have gotten away with it.

I went to my 18 year old daughter who is also an avid gamer on the XBOX and asked her the other night if she has had a similar experience like what Jenny had.  Not so shockingly, she has.  She told me that it was not uncommon at all to be called slut, whore, gay and a whole assortment of names or to get random messages sent to her with boys yelling, cussing or making threats.  When asked if she has ever logged any complaints with Microsoft and if there was ever any action taken she said no.  It wasn’t worth the time to let an immature boy whom she doesn’t know effect her, so she just “let it slide”.  My hunch is there are thousands of female gamers out there who are doing exactly the same thing and that upsets me.

She did go on to say that she is fortunate enough to have many friends XBOX Live who when they hear of another player harassing her just for being a girl that they all report the user repeatedly so that they get banned.  This, I thought, is likely why Jenny’s complaint may have gotten lost in the piles of complaints that I’m sure Microsoft receives on a daily basis.  I’m certain retaliation complaints are common and that they take time to vet out.  And no, that’s not an excuse for Microsoft to get a pass on this.  It’s no secret that their system for reporting Code of Conduct violator’s is in need of a serious over-haul.  There needs to be a system in place that gives those reporting serious infractions like rape and violence a “go to the top of the pile” ranking.  Unfortunately, even if the perfect system did exist it would be of little use until we are able to get everyone to respect that process and not use it for retaliation for minor infractions or just because you don’t like a person.

But let’s go back to my main question I referenced earlier and the need to take extreme measures before your voice can be heard.

Just today I saw an article on Mashable.com where a user was trying to report a bug he found on Facebook.  Khalil Shreateh is a developer overseas who followed Facebooks policy for reporting bugs, yet he too went unheard.  That is, of course, until he used the bug he tried repeatedly to report to hack Mark Zuckerberg’s account and posted to his wall.  You can read the article on Mashable by clicking this link and I hope you do, just for the entertainment value alone.  Anyone who knows me knows I enjoy a good story were Facebook is made to look incompetent, especially when it comes to security flaws that they either blatantly ignored or were too arrogant to take note of when it was being laid out for them in plain English.

No matter how entertaining I find the Facebook story it does serve to drive my point home yet again.  Nobody would listen or acknowledge there was a problem until drastic measures were once again taken.  I struggle to find a viable explanation as to why it is that the things we should be discussing and sharing and taking action on are the last things that get heard.  Why must it require someone to scream from the Internet mountain top “Look!  This is important!  Stop watching that video of Miley Cyrus twerking and pay attention!”  (and no, I’m not linking that video here . . . . Google it if you haven’t already – I’m trying to make a point here, okay!?)

I won’t pretend to have the end-all-be-all answer as to how we can fix our society.  I just want to start the discussion and together we can figure it out.  From gaming etiquette, to respecting other’s right to Geek out over a thing, to reporting a bug, or to politics – let’s all make a conscious effort to listen and pay attention to those who are trying to convey something important.  And you’ll know when it’s important or not.  You just have to choose to acknowledge it and then take action if you have the ability to so.  At the very least, you can help spread the word and stand up to say “No, this is wrong and it’s not okay!” like those who did for Jenny . . . . so then there’s no guilt for watching Flozell do The Cinnamon Challenge.

(What?!?  The story’s over now and you made it all the way to the end . . . of course you get some Flozelle for dessert!  I’m not a complete stick in the mud . . . )  #YoureWelcome